NotASelfHelpBlog

Hello hello! After a long long time again I am here to pen my thoughts. Not as a psychologist or any kind of an expert… but a normal thinker who wants clarity of thought. This definitely isn‘t a self help blog either! So hier goes… I am sitting in a tram, going to work and suddenly I see my reflection in the glass. I start to imagine hey do any other creatures need to see their reflection? Abhishek Upmanyu‘s joke comes to my mind, where he says… a cat looks at other cat‘s hairstyle and „agar iski sahi hai to meri bhi sahi hai“. Mirrors were invented by us and no other creature really uses it. So society, world naturally works on social image… where everyone of us or atleast in our immediate circle have the same values of hierarchy and we get reactions to how we behave, look, wear, how much money we have. Etc. And a favourable reaction that makes us feel comfortable is the so called „validation“. Now what we are really struggling is having conflicting opinions about ourselves based on w...

I am again here after months of contemplating, back to penning down my thoughts so to say, middle of the night. I very honestly want readers to this blog but think of myself as another common man who has something to say but fews ears that will listen to. Writing helps me sometimes streamline my thoughts and it helps my ADHD. I am not a psychologist, guru or any expert… this blog is not a self help blog. When reading it I would just like to you to think of me with yourself just as confused and curious. So on today’s topic of spirituality, It fascinating to me how I stumbled upon this topic to be very honest. I was randomly scrolling a math video. Yes math and you might wonder how math ( mostly a topic that atheists love) and spirituality have in common. I say spirituality and not religion because I have started to believe one thing… One believes in God and follows religion. But first on math, I say following… you might have seen the symbol ♾️ somewhere sometime. It means infinite, inde...

After a long break i am back to writing something. I have been mentally doing slightly better than before. And I am thankful for whoever that has a been a part of this journey in a good or bad way. But since a long time I am contemplating about work. Why do we really work? What does it mean to work. I am not a psychologist and this is not a self help blog. Its more of penning of my own ideas what i try to do here so I might seem incomprehensible read: Coming to the title topic of what exactly does work mean. In the few little books I read „sapiens“ being one of them… I read a bit about how human civilisation and economics evolved. Every single individual has contributed something to the society to bring the world to its current level. The ones who didnt contribute in any positive way were always shunned and outcast. And why not… why would you want to work for someone they arent working for you. I am strictly writing here about the able bodied random strangers that we know exist and hav...

  Death by 1 big cut Vs Death by 1000 tiny cuts I just want to talk about trauma today. I am not a psychologist and this is not a self help blog! So I try to pen my feelings, sometimes very abstract in the blogs.  When someone kills with a 1000 cuts, its NOT the 1st or 2nd or the last cut that kills… its in fact the Action of frequent cutting that kills.  Thats where we go wrong…we compare the cut size and keep wondering why its lethal… instead of looking at the action.  The worse part is, that tiny cuts present a hope that they will heal some day. But can that happen automatically?? Can they ever heal if the next cut comes before the previous cut heals?  Everyone and every trauma has a different healing speed based on where we are in life and what the nature of trauma is. If you keep burning your hand at the same spot with the same intensity every single day, is the burn every gonna heal??  Why is mental hurt any different then from a physical hurt?? ...

 Care? What a small four letter word isnt it? Just like love, hate, feel, need and many more…. Very freely used word. But who knows what it really means? What it looks and feels like. How is it exactly done?? Now thats the real question.  How do you care? How do you show that you care? Do you get the kind if care you want,deserve,need? Do you reciprocate to others? I have been lately thinking about my feelings and needs from my relationships where I stumbled on the idea of what care means. I am not a professional and this isnt a self help blog so I would best put my abstract ideas in ink thats it. I recently realised „to care for“ and „to care about“ has a valley of difference between them. „Care for“ would mean that the caregiver is bringing you material things actively that help you sustain living. Not caring for them would deplete the life in a very materialistic and tangible way… leading all the way to maybe death. If there is no one to care for you, either you have to be ...

     Hello friends, so here I am after a long time with another abstract thought. To be completely honest my life has changed by a considerable factor in the last few months. I stood up for my needs and that too against my loved ones or also some seniors and demanded that I be treated and heard in a different way. I have come to realize communication, is one of the most important skills that one needs. Communication doesn't mean that you speak fearlessly or tactfully. Communication actually is actually a summary of your entire being!!!! Communication starts in the mind. effective communication is in my view a summarized verb for a conglomerate of verbs. It starts with thinking, then combined with the knowledge of your own needs, forming words....next step is clearly speaking those words. This was all the intrinsic part of effective communication. Now the extrinsic part, where the receiver of the said words listens to them and understands them in the way it was intended. A...